Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
