Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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