Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
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