It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
