Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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