he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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