i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
