Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
