The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize
