Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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