3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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