He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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