Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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