I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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