Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Randomize
