brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
