just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
