sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
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