dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
