She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
