why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
