Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
