Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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