too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
