when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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