how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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