She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize