Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Randomize
