So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
