I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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