i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
