i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
If I die, sorry about rent.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
