Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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