I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
True strength comes from lack of pants
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize