i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
