kristin has been a bad kristin
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
