Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
