You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
someone owes me an orgasm
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
