Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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