i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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