Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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