Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
