dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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