i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
so let's talk penis.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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