she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
My bed smells like the plague
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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