How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
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