so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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