just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
