my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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