A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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